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Not a good toy


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People who don't know me think I lie a lot. Those that do wonder if I'm just destined for weirdness.

So on the ride to work in the dark there's a flash and then a boom on the windshield. I stop and walk back and found a thoroughly mangled woodcock on the road. Oddly, I threw it on the floor of the backseat and didn't think much of it.

Pick the kids up after work and head to church to clean. Squeaky picks up the bird and immediately thinks it's the coolest thing ever. So I'm cleaning and she's playing with it, and then I hear "I've got a problem".

Apparently she decided to pick an old skeleton key lock on a cabinet using the woodcock bill, and it was stuck. I mean really stuck. Stuck so bad I had to go get pliers to remove it. Picture a mangled wood cock hanging off a cabinet by it's beak.

And after that we put him away and didn't play with him any more.

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  • 1 month later...
good stuff, I grew up on a pig farm, it was very cool to take the clipped tales from feeder pigs and tie them to our handle bars and ride around for days or until they had to many flies on them...
It happened every year throughout my days in high school. I grew up in a farming community (West Branch). Every year one of the farm boys would bring a small pig to school and coat it with crisco. It was then turned loose in the hallway. The kids and teachers would chase after it....it was too funny. Those little buggers can run and squeal and nobody could catch it.
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